Final Destination 3

Director: James Wong (2006)
Starring: Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Ryan Merriman, Kris Lemche
Find it: IMDB, Amazon

Poor Death. Every time it looks like he can put his feet up and chill, along comes another bunch of stupid psychic kids and another stupid destination. No wonder he seems so vindictive; he's just trying to do his job and kids like Alex and Kimberly and now Wendy (Winstead) come along and screw things up for him.

In addition to aeroplanes and dentists' offices, Final Destination 3 gave me more to be a big girl's blouse about; rollercoasters (which I already hated) and sunbeds. For me, the sunbed sequence is probably the most horrible in the whole series. Not that I would ever be seen on a sunbed anyway. My skin is gross enough already without being made to look either skin-cancer ridden or like David Dickinson's walnut chode-bag.

But aside from housing the most gruesome pair of deaths in the whole franchise, Final Destination 3 suffers rather painfully from a case of diminishing returns. We know the drill by now, and the rest of the deaths aren't fun or gory enough to hold up to the previous films. There's also Frankie Cheeks (Sam Easton), a character who does nothing but irritate with every moment he remains alive. His eventual death is nowhere near gruesome enough to offset how much of a pain in the tits he is all the way through.

With the return of original director James Wong goes David R Ellis's s sense of fun and glee (I know, The Final Destination didn't have much of that either, but it's still marginally better than this). There's also an atrocious moment in which the kids link events in the movie to those of 9/11. A picture of the Twin Towers is produced, the shadow of an aeroplane looming over the landmarks. It's as heavy handed and callous as the opening of Postal. Even more so, since you're supposed to be taking this seriously.

The film trundles towards a tired, predictable climax with no twists or surprises along the way. It's passable and even a little amusing at times, but maybe this Destination was one port of call too many. Next up: THE Final Destination (which wasn't).

No comments:

Post a Comment