Starring: Marc Pickering, Keith Chegwin, Joe Pasquale, Tony Blackburn
Find it: IMDB
It's the Keith Chegwin horror movie, and it's a thing that actually exists. "Pooh," you say, "that's old news." To wit, I am not talking about his nudist game show Naked Jungle (link not suitable for work, or anywhere). Kill Keith stars British TV face and Twitter joke thief Keith 'Cheggers' Chegwin as himself, in a movie about a serial killer who busies himself knocking off rubbish celebrities. Kill Keith will be utterly meaningless to anyone unfamiliar with the likes of Chegwin, Joe Pasquale and Tony Blackburn (lucky you) - and only half-relevant to those who know who the particulars actually are. It's a movie with a very limited audience, but is all the better for it.
The story has lowly TV studio runner Danny (Pickering) lusting over breakfast telly host Dawn (Susannah Fielding), attempting to protect her from the violent overtures of the Breakfast Serial Killer (geddit). She of course hosts a show called The Crack of Dawn, which should give you an idea of the level of humour at work here. Geddit again. The style and direction only barely hides the fact that it really, really wants to be an Edgar Wright joint. The story, part Giallo part sitcom - struggles to be interesting despite some fun death sequences and its bizarre cameos. It's advertised as 'Saw meets Richard & Judy', but is never as horrifying or gruesome as either part of that sentence suggests (true story: Horrifying and Gruesome was the original working title for Richard & Judy).
Talking of horrifying and gruesome.
Best of the non-celebrities (and better than the celebrities) is David Easter as Dawn's acerbic co-host. Joe Tracini plays another Tony Blackburn well, while Pickering and Fielding are quite good as the leads. And you know what, I found the romantic subplot to be sweet. It's neither funny or scary enough to work as a horror, comedy or horror comedy but I enjoyed the film far more than I thought I would enjoy any movie which stars Keith Chegwin.