An exclusive Review Hole exclusive: Psychosis

Director: Reg Traviss (2010)
Starring: Charisma Carpenter, Paul Sculfor, Ricci Harnett, Justin Hawkins
Find it online: IMDB, Amazon UK (preorder)

If there were a prize for most inventive use of Justin Hawkins in a movie, then Psychosis would win hands down. It would also probably win a trophy for the coveted 'most likely to be shit but actually quite decent' prize. From its trailer and description, Psychosis looks like just another cheap and dull ghost story starring a has-been actress. Psychosis is a little cheap, but not actually dull. And Charisma Carpenter aquits herself surprisingly well. It's a better movie than many a fellow Buffy alumni has managed to date (I'm looking at you Sarah Michelle Gellar, and those shitty Grudges).

Suan (Carpenter) is a successful but slightly nutty crime author who moves to the English countryside with husband David (Sculfor). In her 12-bedroom mansion, she soon begins experiencing visions; a hooded youth playing football, things that go bump in the night, visions of murder and suchlike. Oh, and Justin Hawkins is painting her window frames (not a metaphor). Meanwhile, David is up to some decidedly dodgy stuff and the groundskeeper (Harnett) is a probable rapist and all-around crazy person. Soon, old mental problems begin to resurface and Susan must decide whether she's going cuckoo or experiencing something decidedly more supernatural. Little bit from column (a), little bit from column (b).

I know, it sounds like it should star Gellar or Kristen Stewart and be festering in this Review Hole's own Turd Corner. But I liked it. Psychosis has a few good gore scenes, some boobies, shaggings, a penis and enough of a central story to keep its viewers at least midly interested. It's too slick and too mainstream to be as creepy or properly sleazy as it'd like, but has its moments - most of which involve groundskeeper Peck, the groundskeeper's Pecker and Justin Hawkins. Thankfully not all in the same scene. I'm still not sure why or how Justin Hawkins managed to be in this movie, but I'm glad he is.

The action kinda peters out where it should be really amping up a notch, but the whole thing is saved by a twist that's the direct opposite of what one might expect. It's a minor piece, but go in with low expectations and you might just have a blast. Psychosis is a slick, interesting little Spooky Brew that's about 50% better than it sounds on paper.