Jennifer's Body


Director: Karyn Kusama (2009)
Starring: Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried,
Find it online: IMDB

There's suspension of disbelief, and then there's Jennifer's Body. As a horror fan, I'm able to overlook a lot of silly concepts. The central plot point in Jennifer's Body, however, is something that I cannot stomach.

Sure, you can ask us to believe that a cheerleader is transformed into a man-chomping demon. I can even (try to) believe that any character played by Megan Fox is popular and functions fully in everyday society. But the central conceit that someone could mistake Megan Fox for a virgin? O' Hell, I'm stupid, but not that stupid. After a rock band sacrifices decidedly non-virginal Jennifer (Fox) in order to achieve fame, she's transformed into a man-eating demon. After becoming a succubus, Jennifer soon forgets about BFF Needy (Seyfried). OMG, so not cool. It's like a gory version of Mean Girls. And only marginally more shitty. Actually, full disclosure: I kinda liked Mean Girls. So Jennifer's Body is actually a lot more shitty.

Facial expressions with Megan Fox #1: Sexy


Like Homecoming, Jennifer's Body is a horror movie designed to appeal to horny teenagers and fans of atmospheric but vacuous television programmes. It looks and feels like an R-rated version of Supernatural or Smallville. I'm sure Clark Kent probably faced a succubus demon at some point, and the brothers bland of Stupernatural definitely did. All that's missing here is some combination of kryptonite, Lana Lang and a road trip. As the youth today becomes stupider and more vacuous, so do their on-screen counterparts. As a result, we get movies filled with vacuous idiots; as concerned with downloading the latest app on their iPhone as they are surviving Freddy Kreuger (there's probably an app for that).

Facial expressions with Megan Fox #2: Evil

But there's a good movie buried there somewhere here; a splatterpunk version of Carrie, ruined by the self-consciously wordy script and the presence of Megan 'Charisma Black Hole is my middle name' Fox. The character of Jennifer is every bit as unlikeable as the actress behind her. Clearly hired to entice a horny, stupid male audience, Megan Fox is completely out of place in the movie. She looks autistic and sounds stoned. Perhaps Jennifer's Body could've worked as an Indie movie with a no-name actress in the lead, but by cynically going for the stupid horny man vote, the movie loses any sense of artistic integrity. And besides, the script is far too wordy for an actress of Jennifer Fox's calibre. In future she should just stick to pouting at gigantic robots, whining about better actresses and insulting her target audience (horny children) and Michael Bay (himself a horny child).

Facial expressions with Megan Fox #3: WALKING

Talking of better actresses, Amanda Seyfried turns in a pretty good performance. It's ironic that she should be overshadowed by someone with literally no screen presence, but there you have it. She's one of the few things that make Jennifer's Body a more bearable movie; and I actually find her a lot more attractive than Megan 'Dead Behind The Eyes is also my middle name' Fox. JK Simmons is excellent as always, but doesn't get nearly enough screentime.

Facial expressions with Megan Fox #4: Gagged
(most tolerable acting style)

Jennifer's Body is a passable movie that might be a bit more enjoyable for those with a higher tolerance for Megan Fox. There are high points, certainly, but overall the movie just seems too self-satisfied, exploitative and masturbatory (hello, unecessary lesbian scene). Bored with horror now, writer Diablo Cody's next work looks to be an adaptation of Sweet Valley High. Something, I suspect, her style will be far more suited to.

2 comments:

  1. I fancied it. The part where she showed up at her friend's house legitimately gave me the heeb-jeebs, and that black vomit scene.

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  2. I hated this movie with a passion lol. Ok, really I gave it 2/5 so I had some like for it. But overall I could NOT GET OVER THE DAMN SLANG! Oh gosh it annoyed the crap out of me!

    My review: http://www.shiversofhorror.com/blog/2009/12/12/jennifers-body-2009/

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